Did you know that Founder of MyRnR, Karissa, became a Community Champion for PANDA this year? Two months ago she also fundraised $628 for the perinatal mental health charity by hosting a screening of positive body image documentary Embrace Kids at her local cinema.
In honour of Perinatal Mental Health Week 2022, and to raise both awareness and essential funds for this organisation that is so dear to her heart, here she shares her own true story of Perinatal Depression in 2020 and how PANDA put her on a more positive path.
It is this lived experience that forms part of her “why” for wanting to support this charity, this PMHweek, and this vulnerable portion of our population. Oh, and also why she has been proposing that PANDA partners with MyRnR. (Their Communications Manager explained that, while appreciative of the support, they currently only have partnerships with Corporate Donors…which we are not…yet).
PANDA Community Champions Story – Karissa de Leeuw
What was your experience of mental health challenges in the perinatal period? (Select all that apply).
Anxiety during pregnancy. Depression during pregnancy. Social isolation. Limited personal support and networks.
When did you notice you were having difficulty with your mental health and wellbeing?
From 5-6 weeks pregnant with my second child when morning sickness kicked me in the guts!
What were the expectations you had of pregnancy / new parenthood and how were they different to the reality you experienced?
This baby was a planned, conscious conception so I expected to feel ecstatic. And I did. Until I didn’t.
How did the experience impact you and your family?
I found it difficult to regulate my emotions and muster the motivation while at work in my (new) paid role supporting high needs’ primary school students and in my unpaid role at home mothering my toddler and caring for my husband and home.
What happened to encourage you to seek help?
The vomiting and crying was day and night and the scales started to tip in the wrong direction – to it happening more often than not.
Tell us a little about your journey to finding the right support – the challenges and the positives
(From my Embrace Kids Screening & PANDA Fundraiser 6.9.22 Facebook event page)
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Story Time
So this donation to PANDA – confession – it’s really more of a late payment for services rendered two years ago…I had a really rough time in my second pregnancy (following the loss of my permanent employment then COVID cancellation of our wedding along with all my family’s visits); severe morning sickness, insomnia, all while mothering a toddler – I ended up suffering with perinatal depression. Calling PANDA on 1300 726 306, receiving an email and follow up phone call from them, seeing an ok GP, a semi-helpful psychologist and an amazing mental health nurse at Flinders Medical Centre (all free/ covered by Medicare, mind you, we’re so lucky here), plus – you know – eventually giving birth (my favourite bit) helped me to feel myself again.
Learning from experts who understand what’s going on in my brain and body better than me helps me to think and feel a LOT better.
I was and still am so very grateful to PANDA so I felt compelled to give back or pay it forward in some way.
Why the screening? I love Taryn Brumfitt. She is one of my biggest inspirations and one of my favourite south Adelaide success stories! Positive psychology underpins many of my personal and professional decisions and it is the foundation of her films. I loved seeing Embrace with my beautiful friend, Sarah, back in 2016. It made me think of my own body even more positively and both educated and empowered me to parent more positively – when that adventure began unexpectedly the next year.
(You can still see the OG Embrace on Netflix)
Plus, the release of Embrace Kids coincided with a very creative and motivated time in my life (mostly because being stuck home in isolation with two small kids every other week over winter has driven me mad) so here we are.
This is the first time I’ve ever done anything like this but I have a feeling I’m going to love hosting you all on Tuesday night!
Thanks for helping to grant these two wishes of mine Please know I’m always willing to do the same for you.
P.S. I just republished my e-book, “You must be so tired: Poems, posts and solidarity for mums of young ones” with this amazing new cover artwork by my friend – check it out!
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If you called the PANDA Helpline, how did the counsellor you spoke to help you?
They listened. They heard me and validated my concerns. They suggested ways I could calm down in the moments of overwhelm and also next steps for finding professionals that could support me to feel better. Then they emailed me the information for local options and online resources, as they promised. Then, I think, they also called me back to follow up, as they promised. They made me feel less alone, like I wasn’t crazy and gave me a less scary way forward. They shone the torch to see the tunnel I was in did actually have an ending. And that I could actually make my way out. With the help of other guides.
What do you do now to support your mental health? Tell us about any support.
I currently see a counsellor/ doula, who specialises in family and perinatal mental health, monthly. I invested in a six month package with her which includes monthly home visits, bi-monthly phone check-ins and weekly journal prompts.
I also go to a beautifully nourishing yoga class weekly, usually.
At the suggestion of my excellent counsellor, my husband takes our children out once a weekend in the morning for a couple hours so I can sleep/ rest.
I write, read, talk to my family and friends, listen to podcasts (Aware Parenting and Your Mummy Retreat are my favourites). And I now attend and compete in slam poetry nights, too!
Tonight I’m going out to dinner with my friends =D
My youngest goes to family daycare on Tuesdays so I can study. I’ve just finished a unit so will use all that time to do exactly whatever I want and nothing I don’t.
How do you practise self-care?
All of the above.
On top of ensuring I drink enough, eat (mostly) well, treat myself, down tools and turn small screens off by 9- 9:30pm, Netflix, chill & cuppa with my hubby before bed at 10-10:30pm.
Staying off my phone overnight when I’m woken up (even leaving it in the kitchen).
Move my body when I feel like it/ time/ weather allows. I usually walk 2-3 times a week.
Sometimes I get a massage or visit a sauna or have my hair or nails done.
What message do you have for any parent who might be struggling?
You must be so tired. It’s so fucking hard. I see you. I am you. There are ways for you to have your own needs met and there is help available. It’s not only essential that you find or accept it for YOU to be ok, but important for your family, and your whole world to be ok, too.